We all know that life sometimes can become unbearable. We may feel that everything is falling apart around us.

Work, money, family, friends… all these things can contribute to the stress of life. When you feel that your whole world is falling apart, you have to learn how to stop and evaluate the situation.

It’s not easy, but it’s possible if you do the right things.

Take time to pray

Or, if it is not something you apply, you can spend some time in your day to focus on your positive energy. You will be surprised how much calmer and concentrated you feel by forcing yourself to devote a minute to focus on all the positive energy around you and within you.

Worry less

Worrying creates anxiety and makes it hard to do what you need to do. Try to focus on the steps needed to be taken to fix any problem or challenge that has arisen. If you have lost your job, worrying about how to pay your bills will not make more money to your bank account.

Instead of worrying, make a plan on how to go ahead. Put all your energy and do not let yourself sink into negativity.

Pain is temporary

No matter what you are going through right now, be it money problems, family problems or emotional collapse, remember that the pain you feel is temporary. Remember that you have not always felt that way, and you will be able to handle it more easily, instead of letting it crush you.

The problems of others are not your responsibility

When you feel that your own life is burdened with a lot of issues, remember that you shouldn’t take the burden of other people’s problems. Being open and available to help others when they need is definitely a good thing. However, you have to make sure that you set limits and you do not allow other people’s problems to become your responsibility, especially when you have serious problems yourself.

Move forward

When you feel your life is falling apart, the only possible direction is to move forward. Even when it seems impossible for you, you have to remember that you can rise again and continue trying for the best. A failure on the road doesn’t mean that all your plans should be derailed. Life can be tough but you are stronger than the challenges it brings.

Cry

Sometimes, it’s OK to cry when you need it. When things go wrong or when sadness becomes overwhelming, it is natural to want to cry. To give in to your feelings does not make you weak. Often, you will find that once you let yourself let go and cry, it clears your mind and you are able to take the next logical step forward on your journey.

Look for the positive in every situation

When life is falling apart around you, it can be hard to keep seeing the positive side of a situation. Try to see the sun behind the clouds.

If you have a bad break up, try to see it as a new opportunity to find the right partner. If you lose your job, see it as a chance to re-start your life with a career you really love.

Do not let yourself sink into pessimism. A positive view can completely transform your life.

Feel gratitude

When things are falling apart, it can be hard to see what things in your life do not go wrong. Take a moment to think about the things in your life that are stable, and all that you are grateful for.

Your ability to think positively will help you see your problems from a different perspective. If you lost your job, be grateful for the people who support you. If you have family difficulties, take the time to appreciate your partner.

Everyone has problems

Sometimes, it’s relieving to know that you are not the only one facing challenges. Remind yourself that there are people who have gone through the same or worst storms than you, giving you the boost you need to move forward.

H/T: Flow Magazine

How to get in touch with your soul and become a happier person.

We can all agree that life on Earth is becoming more and more stressful as the years go by. In order not to go completely crazy, many people turn to their inner selves, seeking meditation and tranquillity so they could easily survive the hectic lives we lead in this century.

Here is the list of the best ways to get in touch with your inner being, and thus help yourself get rid of the stress the environment imposes on you every day:

Do the things you love and love the things you do

What’s a better way to reconnect with your soul than actually doing things that you love and enjoy? If you’re a bookworm, use your day to go somewhere quiet, take your favorite book with you and indulge in all the adventures with the characters. If, on the other hand, you love drawing, feel free to draw as much as you want. It is very important that we let ourselves do the things we love from time to time and completely forget about our responsibilities. Leave your phone behind, forget the world and make yourself happy.

Connect with nature

You know the cliché sentence ‘’your body’s a temple’’, right? Well, it’s true. And not only that – your soul is a forest that needs constant nurturing. It’s well-known how relaxing and healthy being in nature is, but apart from that, the greenness and fresh air can definitely put your life into perspective and open your mind, especially if you are anxious, nervous or blue. A great exercise that you could do in nature is just observing the beauty, listening to all the sounds, and smelling all the scents. It sharpens your senses, it quiets your mind. And it’s perfect.

Try yoga and meditation

Quite similar to the previous tip, yoga and meditation really help in calming yourself down. Yoga is not only good for de-stressing your body, but also for taking a break from the world around you in a calm and soothing way. Sit in a comfortable position, close your eyes and breathe. If you have scented candles, light them. Isolate yourself from the negative influences and people for at least an hour a day.

Dance

It’s impossible that Despacito didn’t make you dance at least once. You probably have a list of songs in mind that you just can’t be sitting down while listening to. That’s because music has a calming effect on our brain, and dancing to it relaxes your mind. If you are into hip-hop and street style dancing, it could be quite challenging and interesting to learn a few moves. And you should definitely do it; there are many beginner dance classes for adults out there, and who knows, maybe you’re the next Chris Brown!

Inhale love, exhale hate

This quite pacifistic approach to life can also do wonders. Don’t be a Carrie Bradshaw trying to find negativity everywhere (for God’s sake, she was unhappy even on her wedding day!) If you think about our time on Earth and how limited it is, you will see that life is too short for us to have negative feelings towards anything. Try to surround yourself with the people and things you love and leave everything else behind, without words or feelings of hate. Tell someone you love them at least once a day and always be thankful for the things you have.

Write down your thoughts

According to researchers from the University of Rochester, keeping a journal is a great way to keep track of the feelings you have, and a healthy way to dispose of negativity and reduce stress. Putting all your emotions on paper is a good way to get rid of them, and thus go to bed with a clean slate and clear mind. On the other hand, reading old positive motivational quotes can also alleviate your spirit. If you read an entry that was made while you were extremely happy, those feelings might come back even years later.

Yes, your body is a temple and your mind and soul are the forest surrounding that temple. Keep them clean and nurtured, don’t infest them with negativity and you will see how happier a person you will be.

Happiness is not a goal, it’s a state of being.

People forget that although they feel joy when they achieve their goals, daily happiness is what they truly want.

Fulfillment of dreams gives joy but does not replace pain permanently. What we have to do is to stop some small negative habits that bring us down and deprive our everyday joy.

Here are ten simple steps:

1. Stop being jealous

Some think that comparing themselves to others works. It could if the purpose was competition, inspiration or the creation of goals. It becomes detrimental when the achievements of others lead to frustrating feelings. Stop and you will have more time to focus on what you can achieve than what others do.

2. Don’t be afraid of change

Often, even if the current situation is bad, many people refuse to move. They know that they are not well where they are, but they are afraid of the new even more. If you expel this fear, new worlds will emerge in front of you to discover. The ability to adapt to change and dealing with it face to face is the most exciting feeling one can experience.

Watch: Overcome Fear

3. Moderate control

Although many want to fully control their lives (and probably the lives of others), they can not control everything. Even if you try hard, not everything happens as you would want. Once people realize that certain things and situations are beyond their control, they become more receptive to what life brings.

4. Stop working overtime

Professional advancement leads many people to overtime. It is important to fulfill your dreams, but you need a balance to be happy. Achieving goals that are worthwhile are legitimate, however, dedicating time to other important elements of life (family, friends, hobbies) is even more important.

5. Stop blaming others

Sometimes things go wrong. Whether it is work or other areas, people feel the need to blame someone else. It is like a defensive mechanism: we do not want to feel responsible for anything bad comes up. If we stop it, we will focus on finding solutions to get out of the difficult situations.

6. Stop whining

People who constantly complain not only destroy their own happiness but also other’s. What you can definitely control is your reaction to inconvenient situations. The best thing to do is to stop grumble and start seeing the problems with a new perspective.

7. You don’t need to always be right

No one has the gift to know everything. So why do some people insist that they are always right? Even if it were, would it be worth disagreeing about this belief? Sometimes, you have to put your interpersonal relationships above, from being (and proving) right.

8. Exceed limits

Many believe not only that they simply can’t fulfill their dreams, but not even reach them. The feeling of impotence, the belief that your abilities are limited, is one of the biggest obstacles to happiness. If people overcome this feeling, they will have inexhaustible opportunities.

Watch: Remove Subconscious Blockages

9. Remove bad influences

People are easily affected by the people around them. We are social beings and adopt habits and values ​​of what surrounds us. Bad friendships that make us “less” than what we are capable of, prevent us from the happiness we deserve. We must be surrounded by people who inspire us and lead us to live life to the fullest.

10. Forget about the past

The past is full of experiences, good and bad. These experiences define us. The past should not be a record of incidents that people regret, but a source of wisdom that makes us better, in order to have the happy life we ​​deserve.

H/T: LIFO

(Photo via Pexels)

Overcoming Victim Consciousness through Forgiveness

Many of us may be on a path of spiritual and/or self-development and growth. However, we can still get caught up in victim consciousness without realizing it. We may be practicing deep awareness and be able to watch our responses to our life situations. Yet, we may still not be free of archetypal victimization patterns passed down through our ancestors.

Sometimes, we need to dig deep to realize. What is at the bottom of our limiting and false beliefs is a sense of being made out to be a victim. Further, this victimization served us in the past. So, our ego will still try and lock into this default setting with its deep roots to get sympathy. We seek love, affection, recognition, and a myriad of other things the ego may need to inflate its sense of self-worth.

Self-Love and Courage to Balance the Sense of Loss

Self-forgiveness, which is not a well-known practice to many of us, can be a wonderful way to release some of these ties to victim consciousness. As we are all energetically connected, self-healing through forgiveness can also heal ancestral and current victim patterns in those around us. However, letting ourselves off the hook for past mistakes is no easy task.

And it takes enormous work at times. We need self-love, courage, and the desire to remove the feeling of a being a victim, even to our own selves. It takes focus on our heart center, on the feeling of love, and the looping of that feeling through our solar plexus (our power center) and then back through our heart center. It takes filling our hearts with love for ourselves. We might choose to give ourselves the same love that we so generously offer to others. This puts us on a much better plane to offer ourselves forgiveness, as well.

Heal Victim Consciousness with Forgiveness and Boundaries

Another huge part of releasing victim consciousness is through the forgiveness of others. Colin Tipping’s Radical Forgiveness is a most incredible teaching on how to engage in this practice on a soul level. Colin talks about viewing the transgressions of others that we are so hurt and angered by as perfect interactions that our high-self sets up for us to heal ourselves. So that what happens “to” us is changed to what happens “for” us. When realize this, we can release the anger around what happened and release the feelings of needing the other person to “pay”, and thus we release our mindset around being a victim.

We must learn to say no to things that we don’t want to do. Start by accepting that we are going to disappoint people we love sometimes. They will recover from this are “tip of the iceberg“ steps that can be taken in order not to develop resentment towards others that puts us on a train eventually bound for victim-land. It seems almost an ingrained, cultural and societal construct that we people-please and are afraid to say no to others.

Patterns that Reinforce Victim Consciousness

We don’t want to hurt the feelings of those we care about, so we say yes. By agreeing to ways we don’t want to be spending our time, this devalues what our experiences mean to us. Observe these long-standing patterns and take steps to turn the tide toward honoring our time. Being open and honest with one another can bring small steps that will help to heal the bigger picture of victim consciousness.

And once we start seeing the little things that make us feel trapped, we get more used to the inner exploration. This observance of our own patterns tells us how we get what we want and need. Most often we are unaware of just how frequently we might fall prey to playing the victim. We might tell ourselves “I am so alone” when we simply have a feeling of loneliness.

Ways to Refrain from Prejudicial Chatter

We may tell our self “no one understands me” after one conversation with someone who just wasn’t getting us. We may say “everyone is always screwing me over” after one colleague didn’t follow through with something they had promised. These events activate what Eckhart Tolle terms our “pain body.” It is that part that sees ourselves as a victim, and looks for ways to serve in that role.

We can look at it from a higher-self-perspective. Simply because we feel lonely, misunderstood or hurt, we are, in fact, not a victim. We are simply our spiritual selves having a human experience of the polarization of feelings. And if we can look at it that way, without judgment of it and making ourselves out to be a victim, there will be an immensely greater amount of room for learning and healing, both of which humanity is hungry for right now. And, thus, we establish ourselves as part of the shift away from victim consciousness.

This article was originally created and published on OMTimes.

About the author

Heather O’Neill is a personal life coach and Reiki Master Teacher. She helps clients throw out their head trash. Heather, an empath and intuitive, works on clearing energetic blocks to reclaim personal power through choosing our thoughts rather than our thoughts choosing us. As a certified Law of Attraction coach, Heather has a keen understanding of how to work with the universal laws to create lives that unfold as we truly want them to. Heather helps clients go beyond egoic reactions to life’s challenges and to see them from the broader perspective of the high-self, which enables us to experience the most growth heatheroneillcoaching.com.

How many decisions do you make on a daily basis?

Whether you realize it or not, from the moment you wake up to the moment you fall asleep you are being inundated with decisions both big and small.

From deciding what to wear and what to eat, to how to approach someone at work, your brain is constantly making decisions.

While these decisions may not seem taxing, research has found that your brain can really only handle making a certain amount of decisions before you lose your ability to make good choices.

This may explain why supermarkets have candy at the registers. After traipsing the isles of your local supermarket making decisions about what to put into your cart and what to avoid, decision fatigue sets in, and you are more likely to give in to temptation.

It also explains why the creator of Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg, who is one of the richest people in the world, chooses to wear the same outfit day in and day outour. Relieving the stress of figuring out what to wear each morning leaves him the brainpower to make other more important decisions for the rest of the day.

For the average person, decision fatigue begins to set in around lunch time. It is at this time that you lose a good chunk of your willpower, your ability to focus and your ability to make good decisions.

While a good diet or even a healthy lunch can help to reduce the severity of decision fatigue, it really only provides a small amount of relief.

In any given day, your brain can really only handle so much decision making before you begin losing your willpower and your ability to think clearly.

This is amplified further when going through a rough period in your life and when your body is already under a lot of stress. During these times in your life, making the “right” decision can feel a lot more challenging and stressful.

When faced with decision fatigue you are also more likely to eat more and spend more. You also become more vulnerable and are more likely to find yourself agreeing to things that you don’t really want to do.

Biologically, it seems that our brains can only handle so much decision making, but in all of this, where does that leave the decision making skills of the heart?

Could it be that we are overworking and unnecessarily stressing our brain instead of relying on other decision making mechanisms that we have been granted?

Making decisions from the heart takes very little mental strain. In fact, when you make a decision from a place of intuition, it often feels effortless and like the natural thing to do.

Our bodies are extremely intelligent, and it seems that the fact decision fatigue even exists could be a clear indicator that we are not really tapping into all of our given powers.

Using your intuition to make choices in your life can definitely help to fight off decision fatigue and can help you to conserve the decision-making power of your brain.

Here is how to use your intuition plus some other methods you can try:

4 Ways to Avoid Decision Fatigue

1. Use Your Intuition

As already mentioned, your heart holds valuable decision making powers and can be used in conjunction with your brain.

We all have an intuition, all we need to do is begin using it so it becomes stronger. One simple technique is to close your eyes, place your hand over your heart and visualize energy shifting from your brain into your heart center. Once you feel the shift of energy, present the decision to your heart.

Often your heart replies as a strong whisper or as a feeling of knowing. It may not make sense to the brain, so it is important to not try to rationalize the answer. Just trust it and see where it leads you.

Of course, when your are feeling low or tired, accessing your intuition can also be challenging, which is why the other steps below are also important to observe.

2. Get Organized

The more organized you are for your day ahead, the less likely you are going to run into decision fatigue.

Instead of trying to organize what you are going to wear or what you are going to eat at the last minute, consider having a routine all planned out where your don’t have to make any decisions.

While being this organized takes some planning, even reducing a few key decisions from your day can have an impact.

Just like Mark Zuckerberg wears the same outfit every day, when you get organized and remove unnecessary decisions, it leaves you with more time and energy.

3. Sleep On It

If you have to make big decisions in the later half of the day, consider sleeping on it before signing the dotted line. To make this effective, try to not think about your decision or any of the details until first thing in the morning.

Often when you wake up in the morning your mind is clear and fresh and you are more likely to make the “right” decision moving forward. In the morning your mind is also sharper and has the strength to look through the finer details.

If you don’t have time to sleep on it, consider doing a quick 20 minute meditation instead. By clearing your mind and recharging your soul, you can gain decision making power not only from your brain but also from your heart.

4. Trust Yourself

One of the most beneficial ways to avoid decision fatigue is to trust yourself. Instead of going back and forth over things again and again, be confident and bold when it comes to making your decisions.

The minute you second guess or doubt yourself, decision fatigue can set in a lot quicker. While its ok to change your mind, try to stick to your decision once you have made it and see it through.

Often the decision that we first make is the one that we end up going back to anyway, so commit to your first choice and trust yourself.

This article was oirginally published at Forever Conscious and used here with permission.